Le Gars de Chocolat Chaud, Part 4

Happily Never After

A couple of weeks later—the day before my last final of the semester, in fact—the library was my home (though sometimes it felt more like a dungeon). Perhaps the most unromantic form of camping, I had all the basic necessities: phone, books, bagels, orange juice, Swedish fish, a blanket if I got tired, my wallet in case I found myself in an amnesiac stupor from all of the focused studying.

I sat at my laptop for hours piecing together my final paper of the semester on Emerson’s “Each and All.” The sunlight outside stirred the materializing semblance of cabin fever within me. I had to finish.

A harsh vibration akin to the sound of a dentist drill erupted as my phone vibrated on the wood desk. “I’m on my way to ravage you in the library. Just got out of my last final ever!” a text message announced.

I looked around immediately. Am I alone? If I weren’t one of the few saps with a final on the last possible day, I might be outside in the sunshine; however, the benefit of them all being there and me being here was the chance to live out a fantasy. Aside from my keyboard, I could hear nothing but the buzz of the fluorescent lights above me.

Then, over the sound of my typing, I began to hear footsteps. They were not the methodical steps of someone seeking out a book or the doubtful steps of someone who had taken a wrong turn on the way to the exit. He was looking for me among the stacks of books in my usual hiding places. Playing hard to get, I ducked down and continued to type. As the steps approached, I let them go silent as well.

In the fashion of jaws, the suspense was nerve-wracking. With each shuffled step against the carpet, I took another breath in but did not release. I sensed him behind me and tensed up. Is he going to tickle me? Poke me? Make me laugh?

Instead, he turned me around, sat on my lap and kissed me in stealthy science.

“You’re cute when you’re nervous,” he whispered.

“You have no idea what’s going through my head right now,” I said flustered yet exhilarated.

“Oh yes I do,” he said looking down.

I grinned and kissed him back. A clear smack echoed against the windows and down the hall.

“Shhh,” he spouted off, cringing slightly. “You want to get caught?”

“I know how you feel about PDA, Kevin. Don’t worry. Teach me how to be quieter, then.”

“Just a sec,” he said reaching for my laptop. “You’re taking a break, so you need to save. Ctrl+S. Done.”

We spent the next twenty minutes wary of what might happen as he taught me the art of the silent kiss. I delighted in the moment as two parts of my life collided. His hands against my back as our lips moved around silently in sync with each other left me

And just as unexpectedly as it all began, he got up to go. “You need to finish your paper. I’ll let you go, but let’s have dinner before I leave. Maybe tonight or tomorrow?”

“Tonight should be fine.”

He was on his way to Europe for an internship and despite the fact that I had been interested in his roommate Toni for the past few weeks, he wanted to have a romantic goodbye before he left the country.

Following a great dinner at the local diner, our conversation continued as we sat on his bed. Boxes of books and computer cables lined the floors.

“I’m ready to leave. I need some time away from Utah.”

“You know, I’ve thought about that a lot.”

“Experiences away from your family will only help. They’ll forge your beliefs and make you the person you’re most comfortable being.”

“I suppose. To be honest, I was thinking more about the dating. You know how bad it is here. You said you were sick of the hookups and the flakes. There’ll be plenty of it outside of Utah, but at least they won’t be Sunday Mormons living double lives.”

“That’s not really important. I haven’t lived outside of Utah, but I figure it’ll be the same anywhere and you should be comfortable anywhere. I’m glad you’re a good boy and do good things, though,” he said, putting his arm around me and kissing me on the forehead.

I thought long and hard about that as we began to fall asleep in each other’s arms.

Sensing just what I needed to hear and realizing that things weren’t really meant to be with us as he left on his European adventure, he continued, “No matter how many times you think about a guy or kiss him or sleep with him, he’s not going to turn into a prince. He’s got to come the way you want him and you’ve got to love his flaws most of all. And he’s got to feel the same way.”

End of Series.