Why Does Maggie Gallagher Head NOM?

As many of you are aware, one of my mortal enemies is the head of a somewhat significant anti-gay organization. Maggie heads the National Organization for Marriage (also referred to as NOM). She may not have brains or looks, but she does have a zombie army of followers bent on the prevention of equality for LGBT citizens.

Well, in thinking about the organization’s acronym, NOM, I discovered something recently. We now turn to Sesame Street for this lesson:

This all boils down to a childish form of gluttony. Cookie monster may like to chomp down on his cookies, but he had to learn to share. He even enjoyed sharing in the end. In a simplistic way, all these people need to do is learn to share the joys of marriage. It’s not like there’s a pressing need to gobble it all up for themselves, despite any impression Maggie might give otherwise.

Thanks to my bf Chedner for that last photo. Photoshop is amazing.

What Should Maggie Gallagher Do Now?

Maggie won’t be heading NOM anymore, so what’s a hate-monger to do?

Debbie Downer Lookalike?
Crash Test Dummy?
WalMart Greeter?
Unknown Substance Taste Tester?
Pooper Scooper?  (Parade season is coming up and those horses won’t clean up after themselves).

Why is Maggie Gallagher So Mad at the Gays?

This explains so much. How many people really do have one bad experience and let that be what guides their actions towards LGBT individuals for the rest of their lives?

Why Does Maggie Gallagher Not Wear a Wedding Ring?

I asked an honorary MoHo if I could post his creation. For those of you who don’t know dear Maggie (also referred to as Slaggie Gila Monster), she’s the current acting president of the National Organization for Marriage.

Although she is THE proponent for “Traditional Marriage,” married Maggie wears no wedding band. Ever wonder why? Here are the results of our survey of her friends and family. When asked why she does not wear a ring, they responded:

(For extra fun, check out alternative text on this and other Maggie posts).