Glee and Spirituality

For those of you who are diehard Gleeks and haven’t seen this week’s episode, I have two things to say.  First, this post is filled with spoilers, so stop reading at the end of this paragraph.  Second, if you haven’t seen it yet, I get to take away your Glee card and your gay card. 

I spent a previous post examining the development of Kurt and would like to return to that for a moment.  Arguably, he’s one of the most three-dimensional characters on the show.  Despite accusations that he remains a gay teen caricature, Ryan Murphy’s genius lies in the fact that he’s managed to do the opposite, getting at some phenomenally ground-breaking observations on homosexual subjectivity.

For Gay Mormon Gleeks, this latest episode (titled “Grilled Cheesus”) chiseled a new and prominent dimension of Kurt’s character into understanding.  In examining this aspect of spirituality, the episode takes an effective strategy of balancing Kurt’s serious assertion of non-believe with Finn’s silly grilled cheese-worshiping foray into belief.  The result is equally balanced. 

Early in the episode, Kurt explains his distaste for religion: “The reason I don't go to church is that most churches don't think very much of gay people.  Or women.  Or science.”  In the wake of Boyd K. Packer’s General Conference talk, we can viscerally identify with Kurt’s statement; however, as we’ve been conditioned to walk the line and find a compromise between sexuality and religious authority’s hostility towards us (as well as principles such as polygamy and race), the connection with Kurt is not a complete one.

This is where the episode gets deeply philosophical.  While some might see Kurt’s disbelief as an affront to his religious classmates, Murphy draws a very even-handed picture playing out in school politics, Kurt’s father’s mortality, and attempts at reconciliation of diversity among friends. 

Kurt’s storyline has two foils: Sue’s mysterious childhood experiences and the aforementioned Finn plot.  Frustrated with Sue’s ambiguous motives and successful ban on spiritual songs after Kurt’s father collapses and is taken to the hospital, Emma  marches into Sue’s office demanding, “Please tell me Sue what horrible, horrible thing happened to you that made you such a miserable tyrant.”

Sue’s response as she closes the door for a moment of sincerity echoes Kurt’s sentiments of concern over spirituality being foisted upon him:

Since I was a little girl I've had exactly one hero.  My big sister.  You know how much I worshipped her?  She was the sun and the moon to me. 
And while I was still very young, I noticed that other people didn't feel the way I did.  People were rude to her.  They were cruel.  They laughed at her. 
And so I began to pray.  I prayed every night for her to get better.  And nothing changed.  So I prayed harder.  And after a while I realized that it wasn't that I wasn't praying hard enough. 
It was that nobody was listening. Asking someone to believe in a fantasy however comforting isn't a moral thing to do.  It's cruel. 

Just as the show demonstrates range in emotion, tone, and musical genre, this scene establishes a range of motivations for disbelief which a lot of us struggle with.  How many gay men and women have you known who have attempted to “pray away the gay” or faced ridicule in Sunday School for effeminate gestures?  Sue’s revelation shines light on Sue’s even more complex character as well as her paradoxically sympathetic motives for her supposedly cruel actions:

Emma: (interjecting) Don't you think that's just a bit arrogant?
Sue: It's as arrogant as telling someone how to believe in God, and if they don't accept it, no matter how openhearted and honest their dissent they're going to hell.  Well, that doesn't sound very Christian, does it?
Emma: Well, if that's what you believe, that's fine.  But please keep it to yourself.
Sue (sternly):  So long as you do the same.

Simultaneously, belief and non-belief are put in balance with each other as the show’s attempt to reflect true diversity comes to light.  As these two ideas are placed in opposition with one another, they are also placed on equal footing.  This is evident in the warm  conversation between Sue and her sister later in the episode:

Sue: Do you believe in God, Jeannie?
Jeannie: Do you?
Sue: No, I don't.
Jeannie: Why not?
Sue: Because when we were little girls you were perfect in my eyes and and I watched the world be cruel to you.
Jeannie: God never makes mistakes.  That's what I believe.Do you want me to pray for you, Sue?
Sue: Yeah.  That would be nice.

While Sue might not agree with her sister, she loves, respects, and even values her beliefs.  Interestingly, that’s the utopian vision of the show in a nutshell as presented via its primary villain: you might be a certain type of person, believe a certain way, or prefer a certain style of music, but despite any differences we might hold, you are loved, respected and valued because of who you are and who we are. 

Kurt realizes this very lesson as he learns the value of his father’s love and his friends’ beliefs at his ailing father’s hospital bedside:

“I should have let those guys pray for you.  It wasn't about me.  It was about you and... it was nice.
“I don't believe in God, dad.
“But I believe in you.
“And I believe in us.
“You and me—that's what's sacred to me. 
“And I am... I'm so sorry I never got to tell you that.”

In the wake of all of the pain and misery caused by differences in beliefs and understandings of homosexuality, I hope everyone might take to heart the message of valuing others for their differences not only in character but also in faith.  The lives of many would be enriched and saved from the tragedies to which we’re slowly growing accustomed.

 

(NOTE: This is an timely message as today marks the 12th anniversary of the death of Matthew Shepard). 

Food for Thought #7

A response to some of yesterday’s thoughts from Cole:

This really speaks to the diversity I continuously emphasize.

Food for Thought #6

This video came up on my reader via Queerty and left me with some interesting questions as somebody who didn’t realize he was gay until his mid-20s.

A few reactions:

How did I react to more flamboyant gays?

Wow, he looks and sounds like Mark (my first bf—getting home from his mission next month) only half as cute.

Do I do anything to make guys who might not have realized they’re gay more aware of the diversity among homosexuals?

Do I laugh inside about “overly macho” straight people?

Why Do We Like Golden Girls?, Part 3

The Four Strengths (/Chakras)

I suppose the same could be said of a lot of characters, but particular strengths just tend to stick out. As an ensemble of lovely older women, each of the Golden Girls embodies a particular strength and form a balance worthy of study.

Dorothy

Dorothy, for instance, is headstrong. She knows what she’s after, she’s educated and eloquent, and she is the voice of reason that guides everyone else through their problems. She can seem overbearing at times because of her strength.

Sofia

Dorothy’s mother, Sofia, is matriarch of matriarchs. Her strength lays in her tongue (and no that’s not some sort of make out testimonial). Due in part to a stroke, she says things other characters would never say. She’s quick-witted and full of comebacks. She also has sage advice on the tip of her tongue in the form of stories from Sicily.

Rose

Rose also tells stories with the best of intentions; however, her tales of St. Olaf aren’t all that effective for getting her point across. It's telling, in this, that she has strength of heart. She would do anything for her friends with a sweet, though sometimes vacant, look on her face.

Blanche

I don’t say this to be crude, but Blanche is sex strong. She’s been called everything from slut puppy to outright whore and everything in between. That said, she’s confident in her sexuality, priding herself on her appearance and her charisma.

Balance and Unity

Without a doubt, one of the main reasons this show remained popular for so long was because we identified with the characters. “I’m totally a Dorothy.” “Rose reminds me so much of my mom.” “We’ve all been out with at least one Blanche.”

They’re all things I hear often in the gay community. Many of us take note in the strengths of women—everyone from pop stars to politicians—but I think this speaks a great deal to our own world view.

Those are strengths that we want to see in ourselves, so I think it only wise we get in touch with those parts of ourselves first understanding, then finding balance, then finding unity in these strengths much like one would the System of Chakras. Within this system, there are a set of “energy centers” in our body (the chakras)—the focal points for reception and transmission of energies associated with communication, digestion, reproduction and other functions of the body.

This model also serves to understand the role of the four main characters in The Golden Girls: Dorothy’s head-strength signifies reason and drive, Sophia’s tongue-strength provides the group with wisdom and wit, Rose’s heart-strength results in compassion and tenderness, and Blanche’s sex-strength symbolizes confidence in sexual identity.

In all things, one must find balance. Each of these values has consequences associated with excess and deficiency. The vapid guy whose only contributions to conversation are sarcastic remarks could probably use more compassion , and the guy who just sleeps around willy-nilly could definitely would probably benefit from reason more than a carton of condoms.

Ultimately, the goal is balance and unity. As we go through this period in our lives searching out ourselves, it’s important we come to understand our own strengths and weaknesses and surround ourselves with people who even us out, people who we’ll be able to say twenty years from now, “Thank you for bein’ a friend.” I’m lucky to have found many people just like that.